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Lame joke of the day:
Q.: Who was England's first podiatrist?
A.: William the Corncurer.
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These Cops Understand:
In Wellington, Fla., six members of a family were arrested at a mall on Dec. 20 in an incident that began over a pair of droopy jeans.
An estimated 20 deputies, two canine units and a police helicopter swarmed the area surrounding the mall's food court, shutting down two roads, after the Leger family attempted to stop deputies from arresting 20-year-old Frantz Leger, who had returned to the mall after being banned for wearing baggy jeans.
Said Palm Beach County Sheriff's Lt. Jay Hart: "It's a family affair. They get to spend the holiday in jail together. The mall doesn't put up with that tomfoolery bullcrap. His pants were down below his butt. No one goes to the mall and wants to see the crack of someone's butt."
(Especially Old Hoss.)
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A woman announces to her best friend that she is getting married for the fourth time.
"How wonderful," the friend intones. "But I hope you don't mind my asking, what happened to your first husband?"
"He ate poisonous mushrooms and died."
"Well, what happened to your second husband?"
"He also ate poisonous mushrooms and died."
"Oh, how terrible. I'm almost afraid to ask about the third husband."
"He died of a broken neck?"
"A broken neck?"
"He wouldn't eat the mushrooms."
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My favorite word today is ROM. N., surviving the drinkability test. Def.: Subject of an old song: "Drinking ROM and Coca Cola, go down Point...."
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