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Here's a nomination for "Performance Artist of the Year":
In New York City, a man put on a business suit, kneepads and a rubber George W. Bush mask and crawled across Manhattan for 72 hours with a sign stuck to his posterior that read: "Kick My Ass."
Gets my vote.
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According to this YouTube, the Pope is running short of priests so he's setting up automated booths, like this one.
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A Cannibal was walking through the Amazon jungle when he comes upon a restaurant operated by a fellow Cannibal. Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked at the menu....
++ Tourist......$5
++ Broiled Missionary.......$10
++ Fried Explorer.......$15
++ Baled Democrat or Grilled Republican.......$150
The Cannibal called the cook over and asked, "Why such a high price for politicians?"
The cook said, "Have you ever tried to clean one? They're so full of crap, it takes all day."
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My favorite phrase today is tooth and nail. N., lift that bar, tote that bail, get a little drunk.... Def.: When dentists and manicurists fight.
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