They Gotta Learn Some Way

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These here is just trainin' pictures.  You know a child has got to learn some way to act when he gets older.  Well, these are some of the ways.....

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Two blondes (what else?) decided to go out in the country for a hike and to enjoy nature.  They were walking along, admiring nature's beauty, when one of the blondes looks down and says, "Oh, look!  Rabbit tracks!"

The second blonde says, "Those are not rabbit tracks.  Those are deer tracks."

The first blonde says, "No, they are rabbit tracks.  There are lots of rabbits out here."

The second blonde says, "My father goes hunting all the time.  Those are deer tracks."

The first blonde says, "I have a book on animals.  Those are rabbit tracks."

They argued back and forth like that until the train hit them.

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A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.  They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card:  "Rest in Peace."

The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.

The florist replied, "Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this:  Somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note that says, 'Congratulations on your new location.'"

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My favorite word today is father-in-law.  N., dear old Dad.  Def.:  This is the man about whom no jokes are told.