Several aspiring psychiatrists from various colleges were attending their first seminar on
emotional extremes.
opposite of joy?"
"Sadness," said the student.
"And the opposite of depression?" he asked of a young lady.
"Elation," said she.
"And you, sir," he said to a young man, "how about the opposite of woe?"
He replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddy-up."
Doctors at a hospital in Your hometown have gone on strike. Hospital officials say they will find out what the doctors' demands are as soon as they can get a pharmacist over there to read the picket signs.
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Cops are everywhere. Here's a headline from my local paper: "Police: Crack Found in Man's Buttocks"
And another: "Police taser naked man in cavity."
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Karate is a form of martial arts to which people devote years and years of training, using only their hands and feet, in order to make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.
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The operators of a rope tow in a popular ski area were having trouble with non-ticket purchasers sneaking onto the ski lift. Finally, one of the operators manned his post operating the tow while his partner, wearing a discarded pair of skis, elbowed his way to the head of the line. The operator promptly called him back, "Hey, where's your lift ticket?"
The response he got was "I don't need no ticket to ride this tow." At this, the tow operator produced an ax and, with two blows, deftly chopped off the fronts of his partner's skis, just ahead of the toes.
With the crowd of skiers staring in amazement, the operator lowered his ax and turned to the crowd, "Anyone else out there who doesn't need a lift ticket?"
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My favorite word of the day is hypochondriac. N., I think it's a fakeout. Def.: And on his tombstone there was this epitaph: "NOW will you believe me?"
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