It's a Rat-Fink Form of Magdalene

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If you had gone to Dictionary.com one day last month, you would have seen this:

Word of the Day

Today’s word: maudlin

Thanks, Bonnie.

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Some people don't know enough to stay injured and abed. Like this guy.

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A student is playing Trivial Pursuit. When it was her turn, she rolled the dice and landed on "Science and Nature". Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She asked: "Is it on or off?"

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We know exactly where one cow with Mad-Cow Disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America. But we don't seem to have a clue where thousands of illegal immigrants are located. Maybe the Department of Agriculture should be put in charge of immigration.

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Here's a true believer for you: The Rev. Joseph Neuner enjoined Mother Teresa to believe that "her ordeal gave her a share in the Passion of Christ, and that His absence was in a way a 'sure sign' of his 'hidden presence'."

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This lady takes her dog to the vet, and he found the dog's problem: hair in its ears had become compacted. He fixed up the dog, then told the lady that to keep this from recurring she should buy some Nair hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month.

The lady goes to the drug store and gets some Nair. The druggest tells her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady responds, "I'm not using it under my arms."

So the druggist says, "Well, if you're using it on your legs, don't shave for a couple of days." She responds, again, "I'm not using it on my legs."

Then she adds, "If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer."

The druggist says, "Stay off your bicycle for a week."

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My favorite word today is hipatitis. N., one of the titis boys. Def.: Terminal coolness.