1. First, find a baby.
2. Second, be sure the object you found was indeed a baby by employing Class "C" Sniffing Techniques.
3. You will need to flatten the baby before beginning the hugging process.
4. "The Paw Slide": Simply slide your paws around the baby and prepare for possible closeup.
5. Finally, if a camera is present, you will need to execute the difficult "hug, smile and lean," so as to achieve the best photo quality.
6. If you don't pass this along, a dog will pee on your computer.
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Airplane passengers watch nervously as two men wearing pilots' uniforms and dark glasses use canes to feel their way into the cockpit. The plane starts down the runway, and the passengers begin to become sore afraid as the water at the end of the airstrip nears.
With only a few yards left, everyone screams, but the plane lifts off just in time. The passengers think it was all a joke, while in the cockpit the pilots high-five.
"You know," says one pilot to the other, "one day they're going to scream too late and we're all gonna die."
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My favorite phrase today is beauty parlor. N., let me know when you get beautiful. Def.: A place where women curl up and dye.
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