"My Melancolicky Baby"
"The Girl From Emphysema"
"Gonna Take a Sentimental Gurney"
"Red Cells in the Sunset"
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This here deer is getting a free lift across Lake Okaheetee, in Florida. It comes courtesy of a 23-foot alligator that has a serious case of the munchies....I think. If you want a serious look, click the picture to enlarge.+ + + + + + + +
When you get hungry in the library, there's only one thing to do.
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Two elderly residents, an old sailor and a woman, were sitting alone in the lobby of their nursing home one evening. The old sailor looked over and said to the lady, "I know just what you're wanting. For $5 I'll have sex with you right over there in that rocking chair."
The old lady looked surprised, but didn't say a word.
The old sailor continued, "For $10 I'll do it with you on that nice soft sofa over there, but for $20 I'll take you back to my room, light some candles, and give you the most romantic evening you've ever had in your life."
The old lady gives him some quizzical eyebrows, then starts digging down in her purse. She pulls out a $20 bill and holds it up.
"So, you want the nice romantic evening in my room," says the old sailor.
"Get serious," she says. "Four times in the rocker."
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When you've got 8 seconds to spare, go Ice Fishing
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My favorite word today is feebleology. N., there's no pill for it yet. Def.: Something which doctors will tell us that we're suffering from; i.e., the newest disease from Africa.
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