Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by St. Peter at the pearly gates."In honor of the holy season," Pete said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The first man fumbled through his pockets and came up with a cigarette lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates," St. Peter said.
The second man reached into his pocket and came out with a set of keys. "They're bells."
St. Pete said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."
The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow, and asked, "Just what do those symbolize?"
The man replied, "Those are Carol's."
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Follow the bouncing ball.
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A group of very attractive young female city employees discovered they could nicely supplement their income by moonlighting as call girls. One of the girl discovered she was more successful as a blonde after having her hair bleached.
She convinced the others that the old saying, "Blondes have more fun," is true: The ladied became so popular they were able to charge exorbitant rates. They even charged their taxi fares to the men they served.
When hard times hit, the ladies knew they would have to do something. They understood the law of supply and demand so they decided to lower their rates, and to quit charging the taxis to the Johns.
Thus they became known as (all together now) The taxi-free municipal blondes.
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My favorite phrase today is mouse pad. N., all the electronics stores have them. Def.: What hippies say is where the mice live.
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