I Only Use @#$%! When I Have To

Rabbit! Rabbit! Say this on the 1st of the Month (or, in this case, the 3rd) and have good luck all month long. Like I do.

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The 1st of the Month is also when we present our Perfect Post winner. This time it's Vitamin Sea, and how she collects the remote.

"Perfect Post" is the brainchild of Momma K and Lucinda. Go visit these sites to see names of all the winners.

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There are only a few times when using the @#$%! word is permissible:

11. "What the @#$%! do you mean we're sinking?" -- Capt. Smith of RMS Titanic, 1912

10. "What the @#$%! was that?" -- Mayor of Hiroshima, 1945

9. "Where did aall those @#$%!ing Indians come from?" -- Custer, 1877

8. "Any @#$%!ing idiot could understand that!" -- Einstein, 1938.

7. "It does so @#$%!ing look like her!" -- Picasso, 1926

6. "How the @#$%! did you work that out?" -- Pythagoras, 126 BC

5. "You want WHAT on the @#$%!ing ceiling?" -- Michelangelo, 1566

4. "Where the @#$%! are we?" -- Amelia Earhart, 1937

3. "Scattered @#$%!ing showers my ass!: -- Noah, 4314 BC

2. "Aw, c'mon, who the @#$%! is going to find out?" -- Bill Clinton, 1998

1. "Geez, I didn't think they'd get this @#$%!ing mad!" -- Saddam Hussein, 2003

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Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a french journalist and animal rights activist.

The discussion came around to deer hunting. "Tell me," the interviewer began, "what do you think is the last thought in the head of a deer before you shoot him? Is it, 'Are you my friend?' or is it 'Are you the one who killed my brother?'"

Nugent replied, "Naw, deer aren't capable of that kind of thinking. All they care about is, 'What am I going to eat next?' 'Who am I going to screw next, and can I run fast enough to get away?' They are very much like the French."

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My favorite word today is balderdash. N., speedy goodbye. Def.: A rapidly receding hairline.