On the River Kauai

The Washington Post recently asked readers to merge two or more companies or products into a new firm or product. Here are some:

"Goodyear, Best Buy, FluMist, Hershey's and Lay's merge to create GoodBuyMistHerChips"

"Hair Club for Men and Brunswick Billiards merge to create Ruggies, a line of disposable toupees"

"Bridgestone tires, Honda motors, River Island clothing and Kauai coffee merge and become BridgeHondaRiverKauai"

"DeBeers, Indianapolis Motor Speedway Corp. and Frigidaire merge into DeBeersIndyFridge"

"Polygram Records, Warner Bros. and Zesta Crackers merge and become PolyWarnerCracker"

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Several surgeons are discussing which kind of person they prefer to operate on:

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second surgeon responds, "But you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color-coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think file clerks are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in. "You know, I like construction workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

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My favorite word today is examination. N., what is the passing grade? Def.: Trying to determine whether the hair clinging to the bathtub overflow is yours, or his.