I Was Just Thinking About That

It is always good thinking to do some thinking now and then. So I began thinking some deep thoughts. Let's see what we got here:

-- The Chinese invented gunpowder, Nobel invented TNT, the U.S. invented the atomic bomb, and the Indians invented corn. Which has been the most useful?

-- Everybody has something to complain about: politicians, the weather, their job, the next-door neighbor. If we eliminate the politicians, the weather, all the jobs and all the next-door neighbors, would people complain about not having enough to complain about?

-- Do you know that you also are a next-door neighbor?

-- In case you are robbed, will you be able to give police the serial numbers of the bills that were in your wallet?

-- Do crop circles come in any other shape?

-- Why is baseball not called basesball?

-- Why is diarrhea called "the trots" rather than "the canters"? I have always voted against diarrhea, even when it is called "the runs."

-- Why do cows eat hay and women can eat just about anything, like chicken livers, and they both can make milk? I am a big believer in hay and chicken livers, though.

-- Why is it that when you get a wrong number it is always someone you don't know?

-- Why are you the only good driver on the road?

-- Did you know that Tennessee Walking Horses also can run?

-- When Saddam is executed, will the oxygen he would have used be put up for sale on eBay?

-- When I am reincarnated as a fine Kentucky thoroughbred standin' at stud, how will you know it's me?

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My favorite word today is out. Adj., what did you think? Def.: Descriptive of every part you have ever needed for your car to be fixed.