Progressively getting old really sucks. Here I am 75 and 300/365ths (60/73rds) and my health is not improving. I am sort of stagnant. Doctors call this "too bad."What is needed is a reversal of form, like so:
You wake up dead. Get it over with.
You find yourself in a nursing home, but you begin feeling better every day.
You get kicked out of the nursing home for being too healthy. Pass "Go" and collect your pension.
Start to work. On your first day, collect your gold watch.
Work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.
Drink alcohol, party, become generally promiscuous as you get ready for high school.
You go to primary school, become a kid, play, have no responsibilities.
You become a baby, spending your last 9 months floating peacefully with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service, and larger quarters every day.
Finish life as an orgasm. How sweet it is!
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A Pole goes to the optometrist. The Doc shows him a sign that says:
C Z W X N Q S T A C Z
"Can you read this?," he asks.
"Read it?," says the Pole. "I know the guy."
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My favorite word today is palatable. N., thatsa good. Def.: What the friendly Italian hospital puts you on to wheel you into surgery.
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