Dipping Pigtails in the Inkwell

You remember way back when? When we had a series of these? So, here's another one. Some artist is really crafty.

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Good name for a restaurant: Sam 'n' Ella's.

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Now it's time for me to show how good I am at whacking out memes. This one I stole from Yukon Mom, a good writer (also known as Average Mom) you should get to know. What is given are five words, and you pen your reaction. Pretty simple.

Sink: Down in Florida they have sinkholes, where the land suddenly drops out of sight for about 20-30 feet, sometimes into a pool of water. I am telling you this so you will keep your butt out of Florida.

Apple: When horses are put in a parade, they are guaranteed to drop horse apples, which are fairly bad to eat. Shoveling horse apples is not a career I would recommend, but immigrants need the work. Anyway, this is what comes to mind when I think of "apple." I suppose it's the same for you.

Remote: I don't know which is more remote, the Wallowa Lakes of Eastern Oregon or the Green Lakes of Central Oregon. Most people haven't seen any of them because they are looking for their remote in the TV room and don't have time to travel. Utah is pretty remote, too. As is the City of Remote, in Oregon.

Stool: This is a tricky one. You don't want to be thinking of your morning dump, so better you think of milking a cow from the milking stool. Or becoming a stoolie by ratting out your mischievous kids. Or getting some bar stools from the Import Plaza. Just don't be thinking of your morning constitutional. It's always brown.

Tire: Did you know that in the last six months I have gained a spare tire around my middle that rivals yours? Sometimes, though, this word reminds me how tired I am of b**gging my ass off and failing to be rewarded by chuckles, guffaws and thigh slaps. Bastards.

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My favorite phrase today is old age. N., as old as you feel. Def.: When you don't care what the neighbors think.