Welcome, again, to the Land of Rheumatism and Dementia.
I may be jumping the gun here, but I couldn't wait to tell you that I and several other of the Old Folks' Home inmates will soon be on television. Yep, Fox TV is here today filming a series of half-hour sports programs. The neat thing is that we oldsters got to pick which sports would be filmed. Here are our projected programs:
--"Speed thumb-twiddling"
--"Wheelchair Races Sing this Song, Doodah"
--"Exercises in Listening"
--"Game Boy Dominoes"
--"Mumbler Interpretations"
--"Pain Comparisons"
--"Counting Backward From One"
--"Dueling Corset Stays"
--"Timed Nod-off Competition"
I expect that Fox will pick up the option for a couple of years of this. It's tentatively titled "American Idle."
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Just because I'm old doesn't mean I understand anything.
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Saturday, February 26, 2005
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That pain comparisons sounds like the "it" sport of the 21st Century. I predict it will be better than the Super Bowl.
ReplyDeleteExcept they can't hold it in the winter like the Super Bowl because the cold air is bad for the knees -- it would give the players an unfair advantage.
Hoss, this is for you... because you are one of the only people I can think of who would a) enjoy it, b) see the humor in it, or c) use it in their blog. And d) because you probably made half of them up.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.uta.fi/FAST/GC/sex-scat.html
That got me to thinking of a few of my own.
ReplyDelete"Napping for dollars"
"Championship Complaining"
"Hotrod Hoveround Races"
and my personal favorite,
"Irritable Bowel Bedpan Bingo"
Hang in there, bro. I'm glad your mind is still sharp and you've still got your sense of humor.
"Napping for dollars." Hoo boy. I used to have friends who watched "Bowling for Dollars."
ReplyDeleteThen they repented.
I actually had toyed with "boweling for dollars".
ReplyDeleteThen, I repented.