Just Keeping My Hand on the Tiller

Hoo boy! I am mighty grateful for the outpouring of "Happy Birthday to Ol' Hoss" yesterday. Seventy-two comments is my world record. It may not count, though, because having a birthday is like begging for comments.

I might see how many I can get if I throw myself a pity party. For instance, how about if I announce I am about to throw on an application of athlete's foot medicine. Would maybe 70 people feel sorry for me?

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As is my long-standing (two weeks) custom, I am mostly taking today off on accounta it is a day of rest.

Somebody sent me (you) a story:

"Once upon a time a beautiful, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted lake near her castle.

"The frog jumped upon her lap and said, 'Elegant Lady, I was a handsome prince until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper young prince that I am. And then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and feel grateful and happy for doing so.'

"That night, as the princess dined sumptuouosly on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in bechamel sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself, 'I don't freaking think so.'"

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The following is not to blow my own horn but to give credit where credit is due. This appeared, in connection with my birthdays, in my comments section a couple days ago. It is by my good pal Bonnie, who went to Michigan State Agricultural & Veterinary:

Ode to Gene:

On this penultimate day of Gene's 74th year,
He claims to be peculiar, rather than queer.

The irony of his last name is one of life's riches,
Hoss is never maudlin and keeps us in stitches.

I daily come by and mind what Hoss says,
From strange definitions to "the Family Pez."

He's always right: that Hoss is no fool,
Except when he cheers for Michigan's WRONG school!

His love for Betty is especially nice.
He loved her so much he married her twice.

Happy Birthday tomorrow and on Sunday too...
The world would be poorer if not for you.

(Aw, shucks.)

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My favorite word today is lambaste. Vb., flirting and such. Def.: Hitting on the young ones in the sheep bar.