Zippity Do-Dah

Gack! I just discovered it is going to be eighty-eight (88) degrees here today. Shoo fly pie and apple pan dowdy.

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I have tried and tried to stamp out the word b**g; you know that. I have tried and tried to stamp out butt-crack; you also know that. I also have tried and tried to stamp out the use of the word f**k; you know that very well.

None of this has worked; therefore, I am going to Make My Pile and move to Wales, where they have a different stupid language so you never know what the hell is going on but at least it won't be b**g, butt-crack or f**k. Here is how I am going to Make My Pile:

Treachery.

If that doesn't work, I will try

Guile.

Or,

Deceit.

The way this is going to work is that I will get my buddy Bill Gates involved. This is going to be like taking candy from a baby. You know Gates doesn't have any smarts or he would have bought Google a long time ago. I think I will tell him to just give me the money so I don't have to cheat him out of it. I would hate to make him look like a sap.

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I know it is WAY past Easter, but I just now found out a way to bring you this Easter Egg Roll. So now am I forgiven?

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My favorite word today is head. N., not the Navy kind. Def.: A funnel to the stomach.