Pretty As a Welsh Town

On many occasions (8? 30? 300?) I have told you how pretty I am. It is quite a feat for a guy in an Old Folks' Home who is 74 270/365ths years of age to continue to be pretty. But there ain't much I can't do once I set my mind to it. So, the other day I compared my likeness to that of Nefertiti. Here is a picture of what somebody thinks she must have looked like. I may have made a mistake in the comparison. Actually, I look more like Marilyn Monroe (the live version, not the dead one; screw you).

I am hoping to be able to publish my picture here one of these days. Maybe I'll warn you in advance so if you're one of those people who easily swoon at the sight of superior pulchritudininity you will not want to visit me that day. Folks usually faint right and left when I do my Frank Sinatra impressions.

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My buddy TanLucyPez probably thinks that because I have been dumped in an Old Folks' Place that I am the dumping ground for arcane information. She is probably right. So she told me the name of a town in Wales, which is LLANFAIRWLLGWYNGLLGOGERYYCHWYRNDROBWILLLLANTYHSILIOGOGOGOCH. She said, "Maybe you can do something with it."

Well, unbeknownst to all of you, I happen to be an expert on things Wales. I know right where it is, which is somewhere west of London. Several kilometers, maybe. Possibly more than several. I am an expert by osmosis from my pal Chris Cope, over in Minniehaha, Minnesota. Chris can speak Welsh and HAS A WELSH BLOG, for cripe's sake.

Chris has been to this place, and says the name usually is shortened to Llanfairpwll (Thaahn-vair-puth). He adds, "The name was created in the 1850s part as a tourism gimmick and part as something to deliberately annoy the English -- who can't pronounce Welsh words to save their lives. The meaning of the name is 'The church of St. Mary's in the white hazel hollow near a rapid whirlpool and the red cave church of St. Tysilio.'"

I am glad I asked. When I read it, I wasn't sure whether it was "white hazel" or "grey hazel."

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My favorite word today is cope. vb., welsh corgie. Def.: To set out for the scene of an auto accident with a picnic basket.