Warning: A Change of Pace

Yesterday was my wife's 68th birthday. There wasn't a big celebration. Some of you will recall from an earlier piece I wrote that she has Progressive Supranuclear Palsy -- she can't walk, her words are slurred and her eyesight is going. Here is what our daughter the schoolteacher wrote:

THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME

My mother was one of those rare women who never doubted she could do it all, even though our culture put limits on women during her younger years. With this attitude she set about doing it all and I watched her succeed.

This is what she taught me: you can do or be whatever you decide. Set your own goals and trust in your abilities.

My mother had many hobbies and interests to occupy her free time. She was always learning and perfecting her skills. She became an excellent golfer. She was a seamstress with skilled hands that could produce magnificent wedding dresses, prom dresses, finer than any boutique.

This is what she taught me: pursue your interests, devote your life to things you can learn and love.

When she retired she turned her energies toward others, volunteering her time generously. She had a new fulltime job devoted to Hospice, Salem Outreach Shelter, Meals on Wheels, mentoring and working with disadvantaged children through Operation School Bell.

This is what she taught me: serve others. You can make a difference.

Then the unthinkable happened. This woman, whose energies were unstoppable, was stopped by a hideous, indiscriminate and cruel disease. My mind ranges "I can't stand it." But I smile and stifle my anger and frustration. I push her wheelchair down the hallway of the assisted living facility where she now lives and she greets fellow residents heading to dinner in their wheelchairs and walkers. She says to me, "I'm so lucky to have you push me in my wheelchair."

This is what she taught me: You can stand it and you can find something good in any situation. Be thankful for what you have. You can face what life deals you with grace and courage.