I'm like that; I got opinions. I told Tom one of mine by writing in his comments section:
"Should our Congresspeople get involved in foreign relations, or should they be limited to screwing Americans?"
Of course Tom was being serious in his post. I don't have time for that. Here's my platform (which, of course, is biodegradable):
1. When lobbyists throw a party for politicians, require that the politicians be limited to one money bag per person or one 18-hole round at The Old Course, but not both.
2. Capital punishment should become more fun. To many people, this is no laughing matter, but I think they are just spoilsports.3. Congress should pay attention to the environment. The problem is that environmentalists think this "paying attention" should be for free. Environmentalists have totally misunderstood The American Way: "Grease my palm or your palms will be wood chips tomorrow."
4. Congress should spend more time passing laws to prohibit people from becoming comatose. Then the congresswits won't have to call special sessions to save dead people.
5. Congress should pass a law saying that congresspeople will be in the first wave of soldiers called upon to fight a war. Any of them who flee to Canada will be replaced by their wives, wearing designer shoulder holsters.
6. The rule of "The Perfect Tax" will be adopted. This is the one that taxes everybody except me.
7. Potholes will be declared illegal. Traffic tickets will be declared unconstitutional. PMS will be outlawed. (And, for my special friend up in Washington State, dreadlocks will be declared a national disgrace.)
8. The National Motto will become "In Hoss We Trust."
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My favorite word today is puzzling. Adj., worse than a crossword. Def.: The instructions on how to play Keno from your room in a Las Vegas hotel.
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